"No more talking about the homeless"

[Heidi Mull]

Is anyone owed anything from others that they can not provide for themselves?  That is an answer I do not know, but if you look to nature for your answer the answer is no.  That being said I help others whenever I can whether it be shoveling out an elderly neighbor or helping someone catch up on some bills.

All I know is no one deserves scorn. (Which, I know isn't your thing!) Even if they cannot provide for themselves. Or even if the only way they can think to provide for themselves is panhandling or sex work or begging off of friends and family. Heck my parents impoverished themselves on my medical bills for YEARS before I finally convinced them to help me apply for SSI (I was unable to on my own at the time.)

I never felt I was owed anything. All I knew was I wanted to live. So I grabbed at whatever resources might help me do that, and tried to live in a way that was the least amount of burden to others possible.

I learned early on that if someone is helping out of obligation or pity, it's gonna turn sour for both of us, so best to not go down that road. Instead, I sought to build connections where help was a secondary factor, and used as sparingly as possible. I clearly remember days I'd hang out with friends for a good time and didn't mention I had no food to eat for that day or the next. I feared it might "use up" the willingness to help me, and then I wouldn't have someone to call during the days I really needed it, like when it was a hot summer's day and my hands weren't working well enough to lift a bottle of water to my lips.