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Humor
   
Regards

John


I don't like to make advance plans.  It causes the word PREMEDITATED get thrown around in the courtroom!
I'm NOT crazy!  My mother had me tested! Cool
[-] The following 3 users say Thank You to Optimistic Paranoid for this post:
  • Gunny (04-12-2018), Rocki5pr (04-12-2018), CosmicVanna (04-13-2018)
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CALLER: Is this Gordon's Pizza?
 
GOOGLE: No sir, it's Google Pizza.
 
CALLER: I must have dialed a wrong number. Sorry.

GOOGLE: No sir, Google bought Gordon’s Pizza last month.
 
CALLER: OK. I would like to order a pizza.
 
GOOGLE: Do you want your usual, sir?
 
CALLER: My usual? You know me?
 
GOOGLE: According to our caller ID data sheet, the last 12 times you called you ordered an extra-large pizza with three              cheeses, sausage, pepperoni, mushrooms and meatballs on a thick crust.
 
CALLER: OK! That’s what I want …
 
GOOGLE: May I suggest that this time you order a pizza with ricotta,arugula, sun-dried tomatoes and olives on a whole wheat         gluten free thin crust?
 
CALLER: What? I detest vegetables.
 
GOOGLE: Your cholesterol is not good, sir.
 
CALLER: How the hell do you know?
 
GOOGLE: Well, we cross-referenced your home phone number with your medical records.
        We have the result of your blood tests for the last 7 years.
 
CALLER: Okay, but I do not want your rotten vegetable pizza! I already take
        medication for my cholesterol.
 
GOOGLE: Excuse me sir, but you have not taken your medication regularly.
        According to our database, you only purchased a box of 30 cholesterol
        tablets once, at Drug RX Network, 4 months ago.
 
CALLER: I bought more from another drugstore.
 
GOOGLE: That doesn’t show on your credit card statement.
 
CALLER: I paid in cash.
 
GOOGLE: But you did not withdraw enough cash according to your bank statement.
 
CALLER: I have other sources of cash.
 
GOOGLE: That doesn’t show on your last tax return unless you bought them using an
        undeclared income source, which is against the law.
 
CALLER: WHAT THE HELL?
 
GOOGLE: I'm sorry, sir, we use such information only with the sole intention of helping you.
 
CALLER: Enough already! I'm sick to death of Google, Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp and
        all the others. I'm going to an island without internet, cable TV,
        where there is no cell phone service and no one to watch me or spy on me.
 
GOOGLE: I understand sir, but you need to renew your passport first. It expired 6 weeks ago…
       
Regards

John


I don't like to make advance plans.  It causes the word PREMEDITATED get thrown around in the courtroom!
I'm NOT crazy!  My mother had me tested! Cool
[-] The following 7 users say Thank You to Optimistic Paranoid for this post:
  • BCGuy (04-15-2018), Blanch (04-15-2018), Scott7022 (04-16-2018), S Cello (04-16-2018), GypsyDogs (04-16-2018), justjim (04-16-2018), CosmicVanna (04-16-2018)
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[Image: fc762587b3e6f1654afab8c91ea046b4.jpg]
This could actually happen to me!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
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My body is a temple- Ancient and crumbling
 ... probably cursed

[Image: vanclub.png]
I am the Ear-Wormer with a Stinkin' Badge...
[-] The following 1 user says Thank You to GypsyDogs for this post:
  • Cammalu (04-16-2018)
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and for the "Oh my dear lord" factor..

link to 10 min video of people trying their very best to make you feel good about yourself..  lol

some people just don't...
My body is a temple- Ancient and crumbling
 ... probably cursed

[Image: vanclub.png]
I am the Ear-Wormer with a Stinkin' Badge...
[-] The following 1 user says Thank You to GypsyDogs for this post:
  • CosmicVanna (04-16-2018)
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(04-11-2018, 07:09 AM)Putts Wrote: A little farther back...a little farther back...a lit....oooops.

[Image: tumblr_p6y9hcGqRm1vp2ixso1_1280.jpg]

I think that is about the angle of the Bounder I pulled out of the wash at the RTR. The only difference is the driver of the Bounder intentionally tried to drive through the wash.
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(04-16-2018, 05:57 AM)GypsyDogs Wrote: and for the "Oh my dear lord" factor..

link to 10 min video of people trying their very best to make you feel good about yourself..  lol

some people just don't...

I got halfway through that video. It made me feel sad for the future of humans in 1st world countries and learned helplessness. Never mind 3rd world countries, at least they have an excuse of little to no access to education but their cohesive groups and combined knowledge for the groups to have ability to survive even the harshest conditions trumps 1st worlders. 
Sad but funny satire video. Satire is to poke fun at ignorance.
Asking questions about what you don't know, is far simpler, isn't it?
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LA, is spending $40,000 a mile to paint streets with white "GuardTop" paint, which will block 10-15 degrees of heat absorption from the sun. Regular asphalt paving gets up to 150 degrees in sun. The white painted blacktop will be 10-15 degrees cooler during summer.  It will also save on air conditioning costs and reduce the effects of climate change. 
via Business Insider

It is much cooler in Plato's Cave. The light is dimmer there.
Asking questions about what you don't know, is far simpler, isn't it?
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Posting the smart kids is not as funny, so you don’t look for them.
Please don’t feed the trolls 
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The one girl got all of them right, and they left it in the cut. But seriously from an academic perspective. Name the Planets, et al. questions I don't think 'makes the cut' as smart. Perhaps it separates the mouth breathers and kids more interested in licking glue off their hands from one another. But intelligent it is not unless you are 9.

"I am a trophy wife." If I wore a bra this would have me protesting in the streets. The idea that this narrative is ok or worse a GOAL I should think would be more offensive than many of the 'issues' paraded on mainstream media.
Beast Master,JunkyMonkey,Drinks with Wolves,Fup'd Duck,Sheriff Ricochet Cockroach 4B's 1 cluster,3 TFMS
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